Falling in love during adolescence is an experience that will stay with us all our lives. They are known for being intense, complicated, and, in many cases, short-lived relationships, but we all know that couple that has been together for so many years, from such a young age, that their commitment is as big as a marriage. How do they make a relationship last for so many years? Do high school relationships last a lot on average? How can you make a relationship last that long?
This article addresses all these issues from a healthy and realistic point of view for you and your partner.
How long do high school relationships last?
Things have changed. A relationship that lasts from high school in your parents’ generation is not the same as in today’s generation. Four or five decades ago, relationships were much more traditional, and the commitment was much more remarkable from the beginning. This helped romanticize any relationship born in youth.
Now, relationships can last a few months and move on to something else. However, romance is not lost. While there are high school couples who are doomed to fail, and everyone knows it, there are also couples who are destined to be together from the beginning. Typically, these people are “unicorns” as they tend to be stable, with a serious relationship usually without problems.
People looking for a similar future or who do not foresee separating themselves and do not feel they are settling. They fall in love, are happy, and have a healthy and stable relationship.
However, you and your partner may not be 100% stable people, or you may have individual bouts of instability and still want to move forward in the future because your love is stronger. But it’s a serious matter, full of commitment, so you must get it right. Here’s how.
Do high school relationships last? Here are 6 vital tips
Do you identify with that partner who is not perfect but wants to fight for their love? Don’t try to see your partner or relationship as a prison. It’s about seeing your partner as a companion in life, not something that limits you. To make your high school relationship end up being that fairy tale realistic version, follow these tips:
1. Embrace change in your personalities
We are not the same people at 15 as we are at 25. It is absurd to get angry or surprised because your partner changes. You can even change your ideas radically. After all, in adolescence, we don’t know everything. Thanks to experience, we acquire knowledge and other points of view that often make us change our ideas. And that’s ok because that’s learning.
So accept that you or your partner may gradually change your mentality or certain opinions over the years. The important thing will be to assess whether you still fit together through the change.
2. Be open to change in your lifestyle
Another thing that changes with age is lifestyle. Older, more freedom, and more responsibilities. This leads to more changes.
For example, one of you may end up working several hours a day, or you may plan a trip every time you have a few days off. It is no longer about going out to the park or watching a movie together after school, and that’s also ok.
3. Be ready to have other priorities in the future
You may want to strive to stay with your partner for many years and combine that with new priorities. You may want to put more effort into your studies, work, or family.
It will be a matter of organizing yourself and maintaining communication in the couple to understand each other. Remember that you should not sacrifice the different aspects of your life to maintain a relationship. All the pillars of your life are equally important.
4. Be ready for your partner’s new priorities
What goes around, comes around. Just as you must prioritize yourself and take care of the other aspects of your life, you must understand that your partner also has different priorities. Respect her space and your space.
Insist that both of you should dedicate time to your friends, your families, your studies or work, and even to being alone. The need to be together all the time only means mistrust.
5. Accept that it is not a fairy tale
A relationship is not just loving. It is respect, tolerance, communication, and self-love. Nothing is more toxic than “all’s fair in love and war.” If you want your relationship to work, you must work on couple communication and consider your partner’s needs and yours. After all, the goal is to grow together.
6. Don’t set limits on your partner’s plans
Don’t try to be together “no matter what.” If your partner’s dreams involve moving to the other side of the world and yours are to stay in your hometown or the other way around, there is no point in forcing the relationship. You should grow as individuals and work to make it work together without taking things to extremes.
Reasons why you should let a high school relationship go
Your love for your partner may blind you, and you may not be able to see when it’s time to let your partner go, even if he is the one who has always been there. Here are the main reasons why a high school relationship shouldn’t last:
- You’re together out of habit: you know, it’s your comfort zone, you’ve been together for many years, your families already know you, and it’s simply too scary to drop everything and start from scratch after so long together.
- You are together because you are afraid of being alone: you are scared of abandonment, of rejection. You are worried about never falling in love again, of never finding someone better, of no one loving you again.
- Your plans separate you: you have grown in opposite directions, and one of you is forced to make enormous sacrifices for the relationship on a personal level.
- Your partner limits your dreams: he has become selfish, putting the couple’s future as a concept before your needs and desires.
- You have changed until you are incompatible: over time, you have changed and evolved in opposite directions, and you no longer understand each other, or you have strong opposing views that make you argue often.
Do high school relationships last? Final Words
Making a high school relationship last a lifetime is possible. You can try hard and put in a lot of effort, but there will always be some aspects that will depend on the universe. It is impossible to anticipate what everyone’s desires will be five years from now. And above all, it is not healthy to try to limit your dreams or those of your partner to force the relationship to work.
What has been your experience? Perhaps you can tell us how you overcame inevitable bumps with your partner to move forward or add your point of view on high school relationships in the comments.