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What does it mean when you can’t get someone off your mind?

You wake up in the middle of the night thinking about him. It’s almost automatic; you run to Instagram or Twitter to check his profiles and wait for a message, even if it is a meme. You dream of him sending you a message. Of him dropping you a hint, posting a song, something he knows you would understand. You might always miss or think about him, so you start to worry: Am I obsessed? Am I in love? You think about him all day, and maybe you see him on the street, even when it’s not him, and smile at his notifications. But what does it mean when you can’t get someone off your mind?

In this article, we explain in a logical way why you’re feeling like this. More importantly, we help you escape it to avoid getting into a toxic circle with yourself in case it’s something you don’t want to deal with.

What does it mean when you can’t get someone off your mind? 7 possible reasons

It’s a feeling that many of us have experienced at some point in our lives. You can’t stop thinking about someone; sometimes, you can’t focus or feel shy around him. You might wonder what this means and why it’s happening to you. There are several reasons why you might be feeling this way.

1. You are falling in love

If you smile when you see his message, you start having your inside jokes and telling your best friend about him. Oh boy, you’re starting to fall in love. You’re in that precious process where you feel like you’re becoming obsessed. You wake up more cheerful in the mornings. You take more care of your clothes and try to match him, etc.

what does it mean when you can't get someone off your mind - falling in love

It’s an extra motivation to get to the weekend and be able to see him. So don’t worry, you’re not crazy. You’re developing feelings, and the hormones make you feel that way.

2. You feel identified with him

Maybe it’s love, or perhaps it’s some other kind of connection. Maybe you’re interested in their friendship or something else. But one of the reasons you can’t get someone out of your mind is usually because you see yourself reflected in that person. You’re in a similar situation, you’ve been through similar experiences, or maybe he understands how you feel. So you see him as a safe place, and you can’t help but think of him constantly. Don’t miss the opportunity to get to know this person. A beautiful friendship may be born.

3. He is falling in love with you

We all like to be liked by others. It stands to reason that your self-esteem goes up if a person starts paying particular attention to you, tries to make you feel unique, compliments and takes care of you, etc. And, as a result, you end up thinking about him all day. Why? Simple, because he makes you feel good. You may not be in love with him, but you are in love with the idea of someone looking up to you and looking at you uniquely. You like the way he makes you feel.

4. You feel like he is just what you needed

We’ve all felt stuck at one time or another. Your life doesn’t move forward, or it’s all fine, but it’s monotonous, and you feel bored. And then, this new character comes into your life, like when a series’s second season starts. It gives you the vibe that it will change your life’s rhythm. Maybe it’s love; perhaps it’s friendship.

Maybe it’s a future travel companion, a very active person who will help you do the things you’ve always wanted to do but never dared. You are thinking about this person all day because you want to spend more time with them and cover yourself in their essence.

5. You need more distance from him

If you constantly think about someone, it could be because you spend too much time with them. Taking a break and giving yourself some distance might help you clear your mind and focus on other things. Spending time apart can also help you figure out whether your feelings are genuine or just a result of being around them all the time.

6. You still have something to get off your chest

If you feel like you haven’t said everything you need to speak to this person, it’s natural to keep thinking about them. You’re angry inside. Whether it’s an apology, a confession, or something you want to get off your chest, consider reaching out to them and having an honest conversation. Sometimes closure can help you move on and stop thinking about them.

what does it mean when you can't get someone off your mind - something to get off your chest

Holding onto anger and resentment can be toxic and lead to rumination. If you’re still angry at someone, it’s natural to keep thinking about them. Try to work through these feelings and find a way to let go. This could involve forgiving them, letting go of the anger, or finding a way to move on without them.

7. You had a toxic relationship

A toxic relationship with an ex-boyfriend can damage and often lead to dependency. This is because toxic relationships are characterized by an unequal power dynamic, with one person exerting control and the other becoming more submissive. The victim of the toxic relationship may feel like they need their partner to survive and may compromise their needs and values to maintain the relationship.

This can lead to a cycle of abuse, as the victim becomes increasingly dependent on their partner for validation and support. To break free from this cycle, it is important to prioritize yourself and your own needs. This might involve seeking professional help, building a solid support network, and engaging in self-care activities. By prioritizing yourself, you can regain your independence and break free from the damaging cycle of a toxic relationship.

What can I do if I can’t get someone off my mind?

Whether it’s the person you’re falling in love with, a person you identify with, or someone you know could positively influence your life, the answer is easy: Go for it. In life, you have to take a chance. Reach out to that person, and try to enjoy this journey. Eventually, tell them how you feel about it.

You may find this person to be the love of your life, your best friend, a meaningful connection, or a travel companion. If you’re embarrassed or unsure, think about it: what’s the worst that can happen? It won’t work out, and you’ll drift apart again. In a few months, it will be as if it never existed. So what’s holding you back?

How can I get someone off my mind if it is something toxic?

If you’re struggling to get someone off your mind, know you’re not alone. Here are a few things you can do to help you move on.

Talk to your best friends

Talking to a trusted friend can help you gain a different perspective and feel supported. A good friend can distract you from your thoughts and help you focus on other things. Sometimes, just talking things out can help you understand your feelings and start moving on.

Talk to a therapist

 If talking to a friend isn’t enough, consider talking to a therapist. They can provide additional support and help you work through any underlying issues contributing to your thoughts. A therapist can also give you practical tools and techniques to help you manage your thoughts and emotions and move forward.

Stay away from social media

Social media can significantly trigger thoughts about someone, especially if you see their posts or updates. Consider taking a break from social media, even if it’s just for a short time. This can help you focus on your life and reduce your time thinking about this person.

what does it mean when you can't get someone off your mind - stay away from social media

Spend more time on yourself

Focusing on yourself and your interests can be a great way to shift your thoughts away from someone else. Spend time doing things you enjoy, whether a hobby, exercise, or just some quiet time to read or relax. Taking care of yourself can also help boost your self-esteem and confidence, making it easier to move on.

Sometimes, focusing on new experiences and challenges can help you get someone off your mind. Consider trying something new, whether a hobby, job or even a trip somewhere. By immersing yourself in new experiences, you can help create new memories and associations that can help shift your thoughts away from this person.

What does it mean when you can’t get someone off your mind? The bottom line

There are many reasons why you can’t stop thinking about someone: love, friendship, a deeper connection, or an unhealthy dependence. If your instinct tells you that this is a good person who will bring you happiness and positive things in your life, do not hesitate: listen to your guts and not to your insecurity.

If, on the other hand, it is a person who did not make you happy, you’d better rethink what you are doing and make a series of challenging but mature decisions that will help you out of that situation. Give yourself time and ask for help. It would be best if you actively tried to escape this situation.

Do you want to help other people in the same situation? Do you need to let off steam? Tell us all about it in the comments, and share your experience with people who will empathize with you.