Breakups never seem to end. It is tough to get to the point of leaving your partner and managing to break contact, but above all, it is challenging to maintain the zero contact rule. You put all your effort into repressing your instincts, and you try not to be impulsive so as not to send him a message and tell him that you miss him. And after seven long days of crying at night and binge-watching movies based on Jane Austen’s books, you get the notification. Oh oh. My ex texted me after a week of no contact. Panic in the bedroom!
What does that mean? What are you going to do? In these moments of urgency and necessity, when it’s impossible to think calmly and see the bigger picture, we help you better understand why your ex texted you and how to react:
10 reasons why your ex texted you after a week of no contact
First things first: What are the intentions behind that message? Whether it’s a simple “Hey there, how’s it going” or the chapter of a romance novel, you have to be able to see through his words with all the information you know about him.
1. He doesn’t know how to be alone
Regardless of the reason for the breakup, it’s apparent that you miss each other. But has he written to you because he misses you? Does he care about you? Does he want to get back together? Or is he just not used to being alone, so he’s desperate?
2. He wants to know that you miss him
Some people act not out of their feelings but out of their fears. He misses you, but what matters most to him is to know that you miss him too, to feed his ego and not feel inferior.
3. He’s afraid you already got over him
The typical narcissistic guy who has seen a story where you’re dating a guy and needs to know if, in a week, you’ve magically forgotten him and started another relationship. No, he’s not talking to you because he cares about you but because of his toxic male pride.
4. He wants an ego boost
The breakup has affected his self-esteem, and he wants to talk to you to ensure he “still has you.” Have no doubt he will tell you whatever he needs to say to you to get the magic words out of you: “I miss you, and I want to get back together with you.” Please don’t give him that satisfaction.
5. He wants your forgiveness
If you broke up because of a fight, because he cheated on you, or you just said goodbye aggressively or spoke severely, he might need to ask for your forgiveness. He has prudently waited a few days for a civil conversation with you.
6. His rebound relationship failed
Was he with someone else when you left him? Did he cheat on you? Maybe he was counting on another girl to satisfy his needs, and something went wrong, so now he prefers to come back to you so he won’t be alone. Often rebounds make you miss your ex more than the other way.
7. He wants to play you
Beware of manipulators: The tactic of intermittent reinforcement will make you feel the need to get back together with him. He will return when he feels like it because he knows how to manipulate you to come back and think that you need him like an addiction.
8. He wants to clear the air
It may be that after the breakup, there were unresolved issues and doubts on his part or yours, and he needs some clarity to close the relationship calmly.
9. He cares about you
It’s not all drama. Maybe it’s one of those unicorns known as decent exes who only care about you and don’t want to wait any longer to ask you how you are, even if you have no intention of getting back together.
10. He wants to be friends in the future
Perhaps he knows things are tense, but he would like to be friends. He needs to have this conversation to ensure that you both want to be friends.
What should you do if your ex texted you after a week of no contact?
Are you clear on the motivation behind your ex’s message? Now comes the hard part. What are you going to do? Here are some options and tips on how to act when your ex texts you after a week of no contact:
1. Ignore him, block him
Did he misbehave with you? Does it hurt too much to talk to him? Remember that you don’t owe him anything and have the right to ignore him. Please don’t get angry, don’t respond to him. Block him.
2. Tell him you need more time
If you are open to dialogue but still can’t think clearly or don’t feel ready, tell him clearly that it’s too soon for you and that you will be the one to start the following conversation. Sometimes we just need more time.
3. Clear your head
Reflect, talk to friends, and give yourself time. This way, you will be able to decide coldly what you want and what you expect from your relationship with your ex. Do not make permanent decisions because of temporary feelings. Allow yourself to determine when you feel well.
4. Set boundaries
If you are going to talk to him, you must impose certain limits before continuing the conversation. Make it clear to him if you do not intend to get back together with him and any topics you are not willing to discuss.
5. Say what you need to say
Don’t hold back. Tell him what you want to say. But do it calmly after you have thought about it.
6. If you cannot control yourself, avoid conversation
It is too soon for you if you think you will speak aggressively or desperately. It’s best to avoid talking for now.
7. Talk to clear the air and leave
If you don’t intend to get back together with him, make him understand that you will clear the air and nothing more. After that, you will go back to your no-contact rule.
“My ex texted me after a week of no contact” The bottom line
A week isn’t enough time to make decisions. Probably neither you nor your ex knows what you want. Because, after all, we always think that getting back together with an ex would be nice, but what you need to think about is what it would be like afterward.
Learn to set boundaries for yourself, it’s okay if it’s too soon, and you have to force yourself to wait. Your well-being is the most important thing. Talk to friends, make decisions when you feel good, and don’t forget: you don’t owe your ex anything. You have the right to do what is best for you. Have you ever been in a situation where your ex texts you after a week of no contact? What did you do? Let us know in the comments below!