Messages left on “read” are the new unanswered letters. You send your message and wait for a reply that never arrives. And if you have the “read” confirmation, it tells you that it has been delivered and that they have seen and opened it. Drama intensifies! Especially if a person you like ignores you. When your crush leaves you on “read,” you go into a state of alarm: did I say something wrong? Is he ghosting me? Is he ignoring me? This article explains what it means when someone sees your message but doesn’t reply, what to do about it, and above all, what not to do.
6 reasons why someone sees your message but doesn’t reply
The first thing you should do (to calm down, because if you are here, you are probably overthinking it, and you need to keep reading) is to analyze: why didn’t he answer you?
1. Are you sure they saw it?
First of all… are you sure they saw the message?
Yes, don’t be fooled. The cell phone has indeed become an extension of the human body for most people. However, there are exceptions. For many reasons, they may not have seen the message for some number of hours or inadvertently opened it with a slip of the finger without further ado.
2. Were they busy?
Have you considered that maybe they are too busy? They didn’t open the message, or they did but haven’t found the time to respond to you. It’s a green flag that they waited so they could respond to you appropriately.
3. Could they text back later?
If you write to them in the morning, they may be thinking of replying to you in the evening. Because they are busy or because they set that routine for themselves. They don’t want to be distracted from their work or studies, so they answer all messages at one time of the day.
4. Was it a complicated question?
Maybe your message was a question or a reflection that requires some more thought. They don’t want to answer you with something basic or a “hahaha.” Imagine the other person thinking about what they will respond to surprise you. Cute, right?
5. Do they have to do something before texting back?
There are also some specific scenarios where they literally can’t (or feel they can’t) respond to you until something happens. For example, if your last message was “send me a picture when you take Doki for a walk,” maybe they are waiting to take their dog for a walk before they reply with the picture.
That’s just one example, but there are many, many more moments you can imagine.
6. They are ignoring you
Last but not least, they may be ghosting you, or “light ghosting,” replying to you every few hours or several days and with apparent disinterest. You need to know what to say when someone ignores you via text to avoid problems.
4 things you shouldn’t do when someone sees your message but doesn’t reply
I know you’re confused and outraged. But don’t act impulsively. Take this series of tips as a rule to avoid:
1. Don’t double text
First of all, don’t stress them out. Please don’t send them yet another message. Above all, of course, don’t triple-text them. Avoid messages of recrimination at all costs. No “why don’t you answer me?” or “are you too busy?“.
You can’t force anyone to listen. Whether they are ignoring you or simply busy, they may get a terrible image of you.
2. Don’t make assumptions
Are you sure which of the reasons above is responsible for the lack of response? Probably not. If you don’t know, don’t imagine. Your imagination will tend to fill in knowledge gaps with insecurities and opposing ideas. Be patient and wait.
3. Don’t check their notifications constantly
Don’t despair. Life doesn’t end because of an unanswered message. In the worst-case scenario. You will forget this in a few days, so what’s the difference? So avoid obsessing. Don’t constantly look at whether they have responded to you or not. Forget that the phone exists as much as possible for your mental health.
4. Don’t get angry
Even if you don’t get an answer, don’t get carried away by your emotions. It’s not worth getting angry just because of a read message. Even if he doesn’t text back. He has shown you that he is not interested.
What else does this person give you? You haven’t lost anything special; you’ve just avoided problems and saved time.
Things you should do when they don’t reply: Do this instead
Now, let’s think about what you should do when they haven’t replied (yet) to a message.
1. Accept you might not be their priority
First, you should internalize that they have other activities in their day-to-day life to which they give more importance. It doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t care about you, but they have different priorities.
Also, the fact that he waits until he has time to respond to you denotes that he does not intend to respond to you anyway.
2. Focus your energy on productive activities
See the bigger picture. Get away from the screen. Do you realize how small an impact this will have on your life? It’s just a message.
A busy person. Or who doesn’t have time? Who cares? It won’t determine your future. Maybe you’ll see them in person and realize you were wrong. They’re just a person who doesn’t want to base their relationships on social media. Some people seem interested in person but not over text because they hate being glued to their phones.
Or maybe you’ll realize that they’re someone who wasn’t interested in you in the first place. It’s better not to waste your time. Use your time in valuable activities for yourself or with worthwhile people.
3. Try to talk in person to figure out what happened
If you are left wanting to know what happened, why that person ghosted you (in the case of not answering you anymore), and if it hurt you especially, ask to talk in person. Through a chat, everything is colder, and maybe by listening to what they say, you will understand better if you were overreacting.
When someone sees your message but doesn’t reply, it’s not the end of the world
A message is just a message. The moment you start giving it more importance than it has, you need to rethink the time you spend on the phone. You probably need to step away and change your perspective.
Above all, try to value interpersonal relationships more and learn to read the meaning the other person gives to the messages. Are they the typical old-school people who prefer not to use WhatsApp more than for what is fair and necessary, or are they addicted to the phone and ignoring you?
Have you ever been ignored by someone via text message? How did you react? Share your story in the comments. We’d love to hear it!