We’ve begun to intuitively think of Christmas as a Valentine’s Day that lasts a couple of weeks. When you’re in a relationship, the Christmas tree lights seem to romanticize the atmosphere, the TV and Netflix only have cheesy movies, and the family constantly asks about your love life. All of this can be especially hard if it’s your first Christmas without a partner after several years, you’ve just gone through a breakup, or it seems like all your cousins, siblings, etc., have partners except you. That’s why we offer you this little guide of things to do and avoid if you’re single at Christmas:
What to do if you are single at Christmas
Change your perspective on Christmas. After all, it’s just a couple of weeks of vacations, festivities, and excuses to eat more and get together with the family. What can you do if you find it especially difficult to be single at Christmas?
1. Time to travel
Change the way you look at these holidays. If you have time, find a trip that fits your budget. There is probably a friend who is in the same situation as you. Try to convince them to escape from family dinners and spend a different Christmas.
If you don’t feel like going on a big trip, you can take a one or two-day express trip close to your hometown or go to a cabin in the mountains. Explore and get to know yourself.
2. See friends you never see
You must divide your time between your friends and your partner in a relationship. Take advantage of the fact that you now have a lot more time to see those friends you never see or to make those plans you planned years ago and never got around to making.
Push yourself to make those plans even if you don’t always feel like it, and you’ll surprise yourself by having a good time.
3. Spend time with your family
How long has it been since you’ve spent quality time with your family? Although it’s often lazy, you may have a good time with some of your family members.
Go to the movies or do movie nights at home, cook together, have picnics, etc. Any excuse is a good one to reinforce the bonding with your family.
4. Take the opportunity to work
You don’t feel like bonding this Christmas? You might feel better about yourself if you spend a little more time on your work or studies. Spending your time and energy doing something productive will make you feel better about yourself, and you will feel more fulfilled.
You can also invest your time in doing something new. Learn a language? Take up a sport? Enrich yourself. Everything counts as long as you don’t become one with your couch.
Things to avoid if you are single at Christmas
Almost more important than the thousand ways in which you can take advantage of Christmas are a series of things to avoid at all costs if you are single at Christmas to protect yourself from uncomfortable, painful situations or simply mistakes:
1. Avoid couples dinners
Be honest with your friends and explain the situation. You don’t need to play hard to get and expose yourself to the typical friend dinners where everyone brings their partners. Tell them to skip this occasion and propose another one where you see each other alone.
2. Don’t text your ex
Same old story. You feel lonely and go to the comfort zone where you know you once received the love you think you need. Plus, with Christmas romanticized, it’s much easier to fall into these mistakes. Because, yes, that’s a mistake.
Not cliché, but if it ended, it was for a reason. Better alone than in bad company. Don’t open old doors just because you feel desperate. Accept that it’s okay to miss and do nothing about it. But don’t text your ex. Not even if your ex unblocked you recently.
3. This is not the time to use Tinder
You’re going to try to romanticize everything. Everyone is desperately looking for companionship at Christmas, so it’s the wrong time to use any dating app. Give yourself a break, be alone, and understand that you are not a failure for not having a partner during this period. Don’t become a red flag on Tinder.
4. Don’t become the Grinch
Beware of becoming a hater of Christmas, couples, and romance just because you don’t want it. Something so ingrained in our culture will not change just because you’re single this year.
Don’t become the typical grumpy person who complains about everything and everyone because you are not doing well romantically. Accept that we all have our time.
Why being single at Christmas can be a good thing
Being single at Christmas can be not only complicated but also optimistic. Everything that costs us effort is a learning experience. These are the positive aspects of enjoying time alone at Christmas:
1. Fighting the Christmas stereotype
Why do we have to accept that we must be with a couple? You know that love at Christmas is commercial love. It’s all made up. It’s romanticized because that’s what sells, and that’s what people like.
You can’t cancel Christmas because you realize it, but you can accept that the most important love in your life is the one you have for yourself because it is the only true love that will accompany you every day.
2. Understand that having a partner at Christmas is social pressure
Maybe it wouldn’t matter so much if it wasn’t for all the classic Christmas movies or because your aunt keeps asking you if you have a partner.
Couples who don’t see each other during the year suddenly upload a thousand photos together on Instagram. But don’t worry. All those signs of affection will disappear in February. They reappear on Valentine’s Day, and you can forget about them until next year.
3. No more pressure from the in-laws
Let’s be honest. And how nice it is to avoid meetings with your partner’s family? No more pressure about how many kids you want when you’re getting married or putting up with your partner’s uncle’s closed-minded ideas.
4. No more hassle with gifts
Last but not least: you are free from having to spend weeks thinking and searching for gifts. Plus, all the money you save can be spent on yourself, which you deserve.
Single at Christmas? Enjoy your time!
Christmas is a short but intense period. In the end, it’s what you make of it. Don’t let yourself be a hater, and shut yourself up. Get out of the hole, take advantage of the time you have to take care of yourself and love yourself, and appreciate the people who are now in your life.
And above all, remember, it’s only a couple of weeks. You can survive it. Have you ever thought about how many people are single at Christmas? You’re not alone! How did you make the most of it if you were single at Christmas? We would love to hear from you in the comments below!